I CAN'T DECIDE! - 3 Helpful Steps for Indecision

I am indecisive.  In fact I was just wondering if I should write; I can be indecisive.  Which one is better?  Which one is right?  Those two questions taunt and haunt me.  When faced with choices it can be almost debilitating to try and figure out what’s better and what’s “right”. 

What if both paths look good??

When I’m feeling indecisive, I’m not in the flow of my energy.  And because I’m not in the flow, I am actually draining my energy and joy from life.  I can actually feel it.  I feel it in the pit of my stomach, it feels turbulent and sick, I feel it in my head in the form of chaos – my thoughts tumbling around without any focus, and I feel it in my emotions, I feel frustrated, angsty, uncomfortable and sometimes angry. 

Indecisiveness is difficult because sometimes life is truly giving us two or more great choices at any time.  The key for me, is to realize that there is not a right way and a wrong way, it’s just one way, the way we choose and then the consequences of that choice.  It’s true, some decisions will bring about negative consequences, if they are not aligned with our highest and best self; but that’s life.  And with each decision we make, we get closer and closer to our true self. 

HOW TO DEAL WITH CREPE-Y SKIN - 3 STEPS

Yes I have crepe-y skin, AND I still show my legs!

Crepe-y, drape-y, dry, “old” looking skin…IS THERE ANYTHING WORSE? Well, yes, but it’s it’s definitely at the top of the list of cringe worthy, despair inducing, feelings of hopelessness in the beauty realm.   Why?  Because not only do we think it looks “bad”, but also because it induces feelings of panic that one is getting older, doesn’t look as good, or is less desirable, or has less clothing options.  It also includes feelings of insecurity, where we feel exposed in the world, lest someone see our imperfections and judge us; and mostly because it’s just so darn hard to fix, “cure”, or deal with in a way that leads to satisfaction.  Whew!!

So if you’ve ever encountered or dealt with crepe-y skin then you know what I’m talking about.  If you haven’t, go enjoy your life for goodness sake; or read on so you can be prepared if and when it happens to you.  But no matter where you fall on the crepe scale, you can probably benefit from the following suggestions, tips and tricks.  These are the things that work for me.

When You're In a Rush, Slow Down

Nothing is more important than the present moment.

Someone once told me that when you’re in a rush, slow down. I can’t tell you how many times that simple phrase has helped me. Contrary to popular belief, rushing doesn’t get us anywhere faster or get anything more accomplished.  

Rushing also adds undo stress that exacerbates the goal we are hoping to accomplish. From driving too fast to doing too many things at once; rushing seems to do more harm than good.  When we rush, our breathing is shallow and raised, our thoughts are chaotic and overwhelming, and we feel out of control like we are spinning our wheels and getting nowhere. 

Rushing robs us of joy and perpetuates the exact feelings and actions we are trying to avoid.  As crazy as it sounds, sometimes stopping an doing the exact opposite is the sanest and quickest route to peace of mind and accomplishing our goals.

B.Y.O.B. - Be Your Own Best-Friend

Learning to be your own best friend is one of the best things you can do for yourself. Why? Because best friends always have your back and you can count on them to lend an ear or a helping hand. A best friend will love you and support you and tell it like it is; but will never run you down. As a matter of fact, if anyone talks smack about you, a best friend would be the first one to come to your defense.  Best friends are invaluable, so being our own is definitely worth our while. 

Best-friends challenge you and make life more fun!

When we are someone's best friend, we pride ourselves on being their champion. We see their beauty, charms, talents and their immense potential for whatever they want. We see clearly who they are and how precious and special they are; we are their biggest fan and strongest supporter. I have been lucky enough to not only have a best friend in my sister, but to have numerous besties throughout my life.  

Take Control of Your Life – 5 Practices That Help

Life's a journey.  Choose the paths that best serve you!

We are the gatekeepers of everything we put in our bodies.  We actually choose the food, the thoughts, the emotions, the exercise; everything that we put into and do to our bodies.  It can feel like our thoughts are random and outside of ourselves and that we don’t have any control over them.  It feels like our emotions are out of control and that they do whatever they feel like.  We even feel as if our food choices or the types of food we eat are not our own.  We say things like, I could never give up sugar or I have to eat meat every day, I hate vegetables, or I'm not pretty; and we take these statements as the gospel, like they came from someone other than ourselves and were given to us. 

It’s amazing to think that we have in many ways given up our say in our mental, physical, emotional and spiritual health and well-being.  We say over and over to ourselves what is wrong, like there is nothing to be done about it.  We think to ourselves and reinforce a small aspect of our experience and make that “who we are”.  I am overweight, I have allergies, I am depressed, I hate so and so, I could never do that…whatever “that” may be; and once we label ourselves or our parents do or our friends or peers or a stranger; we make that a truth about us that is set in stone and cannot be changed. 

The Best Mascara is Totally Tubular

One of the most important beauty items for me, is mascara.  I am fair, with light blonde hair…not only on my head, (yay), but on my lashes, (boo).  Because of this, mascara is essential to helping me feel presentable and pretty and like I have “eyes”.  And because I am frugal and constantly on the lookout for things that are simple and work; the search for the right mascara was on. 

Yours truly with no "eyes"/mascara

Because of my fair skin and “white” eyelashes, I have tried just about every type of mascara.  From the inexpensive to the “luxury” brands, I’ve given them a chance.  Maybelline in the pink tube, yup. Lancome, Benefit, Physician’s Formula, Cover Girl, Estee Lauder; and on and on. 

Like I mentioned earlier, I just didn’t feel pretty until I had my “eyes” on.  Because of this, I wanted a product that became part of me and actually looked natural, but most importantly STAYED PUT!!  The issue that I’ve had with every other mascara was that when I put it on, some part of it would end up under my lower lashes, in the form of a smear, smudge, or residue or flake or running; not only that, ANY kind of unforeseen change in weather, emotion or activity could exacerbate the aforementioned disasters – swimming, crying, laughing too hard, wind…you never knew, and waterproof mascara was too harsh, sticky and stiff! 

Simple Ways to Have More Joy in Your Life

Joy – a feeling of great pleasure & happiness

True joy and happiness comes from within.  It is always a feeling we recognize inside ourselves, and yet we can fall into the trap of only seeking it outside.  The tendency is to want more….more of what we think will make us happy…money, love, fame, success, stimulation, adulation, fun etc.  And yes, I want those things too, but I’ve found that in order to truly enjoy those things, we have to be satisfied within ourselves with what we already have and accepting and appreciating where we are. 

Seek JOY and you will find it!

The pursuit of our heart’s desires should come with contentment, not more of an ache in our hearts that it’s not enough or that we are fundamentally not enough.  Our heart’s desires should be the whispers of what we can accomplish – of what God or the Universe know we can become or attain.  Whatever you can dream or believe, you can become…otherwise it wouldn’t be there, calling to us.  Joy is knowing that life is attainable.  God wants us to have life and to live it more abundantly. 

3 Steps to Learning to Value Yourself

How do we value ourselves?  We are constantly looking for validation from our friends, co-workers, family, significant others and even strangers; sometimes especially from strangers.  Does this dress look good on me?  Do you think I should cut my hair?  Do you like my boyfriend?  We are forever looking outside of ourselves for the answers. 

Awareness is the first step.

It’s amazing how much we seek others opinions only to disregard them if they don’t match our own view of ourselves.  If you think you are fat, you may spend a great deal of energy trying to prove to yourself that you are.  Your loved ones can swear that you’re not and tell you over and over again how great you look, and even though you value their opinions, (on other stuff), you only see fat, so they may as well save their breath.

Two Steps to Get What You Want & Stay Present

The universe wants us to be happy. Yay!

Everyone seems to be talking lately about staying present.  We are in our heads, either worrying about the past or fretting over the future.  We are being told that we need to “stay present” in order to enjoy our lives and the only moment we have is NOW.  But now that we are aware that we are NOT living fully in the present we can add worrying that we aren’t to our already long list of things we’re not doing right. 

Sometimes the more I learn to enlighten myself just feels like a gigantic burden on how far I have to go.  But don’t fret, wanting to be more present is a worthy endeavor and by simply wanting to do it, we are already on the way to getting there.  Whew!

ASK

The first step is to get into the habit of asking for what we want.  This also is one of the best ways to get into the habit of praying.  If you are like me and didn’t grow up with prayer, then it may seem like a foreign concept.  I wasn’t taught how to pray and I certainly didn’t know who or what I was praying to or what to ask for or if I even had a right to ask for anything.  I felt like a fraud.

How I Stay Healthy

Tips, Tricks, and Tools

If you read my post, “Become a Lean, Mean, CLEAN Machine”, then you know that I have done the “Clean” Cleanse by Dr. Junger twice.  I really believe in this program and recommend the book, and the cleanse as a great way to learn about your body, food and toxicity, take control of your health, and begin a new journey to feeling and looking your best.

Jar salads keep me prepared to eat well.

It’s one thing to do a 21 to 30 day program, but it’s quite another to actually change your lifestyle and have something become a new routine or habit.  I definitely believe in the power of good food and making healthy choices, but I also know how difficult it can be to make these changes and stick with it.  I’m as susceptible as anyone, and can succumb to temptation, laziness and apathy.  Therefore, not only do I have to have my desire to eat healthy, I have to have things in place to ensure that I’ll be successful.

Tips and Tricks:

Edit your kitchen – give your kitchen a make-over; a food make-over.  Go thru your cupboards, pantry and refrigerator and clear out all the junk.  Get rid of as much of the processed foods as you can handle.  Anything in a box is suspect.  My philosophy is, “if it’s not in the kitchen, I can’t eat it”. 

Become a Lean Mean CLEAN Machine

"Clean" is the Cleanse I Recommend

INTRO TO CLEAN

I recently completed a 21-day detox program called “Clean” by Dr. Alexander Junger.  I love this program, and it has jump-started a new way for me of looking at life and eating.  I did it about 4 years ago as well, and loved the results.  I was ready once again to change some of my habits and create a happier healthier me.

Feeling good after "Clean" on the Oregon Coast.

There are a lot of cleanses out there and ways to detoxify your body, and I’ve looked at many.  I believe Clean to be the best-rounded, simplest and user friendly system out there.  I like that you eat real food and you can tailor it to make it workable for you.  I loved Dr. Junger’s own story and experiences as well as his well-researched information on food, toxicity and how our bodies work.  The book itself is an education and well worth the read.  I re-read it prior to beginning the 21-day program for the 2^nd time – it’s that worthwhile.

8 EASY and ECONOMICAL Style Tips 

to Make Getting Dressed Hassle Free

How did getting dressed become such a chore?  Style should be fun or at least not something you dread.  The truth is, we can ALL feel good about how we look. 

Me, following some of my tips!

Why do some women just seem to instinctively know what their style is or how to buy and put together the coolest items?  Do they really have a “style gene” that the rest of us lack?  Or do they just have interest, aptitude and a few trusty style tips they abide by?  That’s what I believe and I also believe that once you have adopted a few of these tips and start feeling a bit more confident and successful; getting dressed starts being more fun and you begin to exert your own individual flair.

Remember, style is for YOU.  If you feel good, and you feel that you look good, then that’s all that matters.

Be a Yes!

Yes is the best!

There was a time in my life when I let fear run my life and I became a NO.  I didn’t go on ski trips or other trips with my friends, I didn’t live with passion or excitement, I didn’t take chances or try new things, I wasn’t bold and I certainly did not “face my fear and do it anyway”.  In fact, I allowed my fear to take center stage and keep me “safe”.  

If I didn’t go anywhere or try anything new; how could I fail?  If I stayed close to home; how could anything bad happen to me?  The problem I later realized, is that I already had failed and something bad had already happened.  I had cut off my life force and was stuck in fear and inertia.  I felt that NO kept me from choosing the wrong thing, but NO was and is a choice with as many outcomes and consequences as YES. 

I Can Do It! (Affirmations, Mantras, and Positivity, OH MY)

I wish I knew this tree's mantra!

Over the years, I’ve dabbled in affirmations.  I’ve read about them.  I’ve written them down.  I believe in them.  I’ve learned to pay attention to what I’m thinking and then change it to something more positive.  I’ve even spent days trying to immerse myself in a positive thought – repeating it over and over like a mantra.  And all of that was helpful and got me further along on the path. 

But something’s missing.  For some reason or another, I always stop practicing them, or I lose interest, or I feel I’m not picking the right one, or I over-think it – (no, not me!).  So now I want to create a system that works for me – something that sticks and rings true, something that I want to do. 

My brain can be as undisciplined as they come.  I used to believe that my brain was just the way it was, like it was designed to do what it does, and think the way it thought and I didn’t have any control over it.  Imagine my delight when I began to learn that I could change my thinking, my patterns; my very brain waves.  I am still intrigued and excited by that, it’s a big reason I do what I do. 

The Pursuit of Happiness…simple ways to get where you want to go while enjoying today

Mother Nature has a way of stopping us in our tracks.

I recently moved back to my hometown.  It’s a beautiful place filled with all the things that I love; mountains, a gorgeous lake, tons of trails and just about every outdoor activity you can think of.  But the thing that it has that I love the most is my sweetheart, who I finally found at the age of 49.  I have known this wonderful man since I was a five year old girl in this same town, and after all these years and full lives apart, we are finally together and happy.  I moved back to this hometown so we could build a life together.  

So this is what I am dealing with; if one of my life goals was to find a true partner with whom I can share my life with, and that goal is now fulfilled, then why can’t I bask in that serenity and joy for a while?  Hey, don’t get me wrong, I DO bask, but in the back of my brain and many times, right in the forefront, I have the reoccurring and nagging pressure to do more, more, more!  In other words, fulfill my “purpose”, or live up to my potential.  As my sister would say, “Sounds exhausting”.  

So there it is, in the “pursuit of happiness”, do we ever get to stop and just BE happy?  

Let's Get Physical

“Five Simple Ways to Use Your Body to Feel Better”

 Beautiful inside and out. 

Are you feeling sad, depressed, or unmotivated?  Do the afternoon doldrums have you down?  Chances are if you’re feeling low, your body language is reflecting those feelings in the way you carry yourself.  Maybe you’re slumping with shoulders hunched, head bent, eyes down, not smiling, and breathing shallow.  But our bodies are smart and we can use that intelligence to feel better.

We don’t need to wait for circumstances to change to feel more joy.  We don’t need to run to a pick me up like alcohol, coffee, or shopping.  We don’t need to feel helpless or hopeless and wait for your emotions to change.  Relief can be right where we are.  We can use our body to help fight the blues and give us more energy. 

ASK -- You Might Get It

Let’s ask for what we want! 

Ask and ye shall receive.  This is one of the most popular quotes, but how can we apply it in our everyday lives?   Many of us don’t really know what to ask for, how to ask, or to whom to ask.  But one thing is clear, if we don’t ask, we’re probably not going to get it.

By starting the practice of asking, we begin to accomplish two things; one, we start to become more aware of who we are and what we want, and two, we articulate to others what we want, so they can give it to us.  People cannot give us what we want unless we know what that is.  No one is a mind reader; no one I’ve met anyway.

Down and Dirty Ways to Keep Your House Neat and Clean

 A clean slate feels so good!

I really hate a dirty house, but more than that, I dislike cleaning my whole house at once. But I sure love looking around my house when all is neat and tidy and better yet, actually clean. When my house is tidy I feel at peace and the options to do something else are endless. I can relax and not feel as if I SHOULD be doing something else. 

I am not a “clean freak”, but I do like my home to picked-up and relatively clutter free, and when it’s actually clean, I feel pretty satisfied and smug. Therefore, I have adopted a few strategies to keep my house looking presentable and me calm and peaceful…for the most part.

Three Steps to a More Joy-filled Life

Desire, dedication & discipline in action!

We are the gatekeepers of everything we put in our bodies. We actually choose the food, the thoughts, the emotions, and everything else. It can feel like our thoughts are random and outside of ourselves and that we don’t have control over them. It sometimes feels as if our emotions are random and they do whatever they like. We can even feel as if our food choices are not our own.

It’s amazing to think that we have in many ways given up our say in our mental, physical, emotional and spiritual health. We think to ourselves and reinforce a small aspect of our experience and make that “who we are”. We say to ourselves, "I am overweight”, “I have allergies”,” I am depressed”, “I hate so and so”, “I could never do that”…; and once we label ourselves; we make that a truth about us that is set in stone and cannot be changed.